So last week, I waltzed into Ritual hoping to bump into some of those good time folks. Turns out most of them are already in Portland for the Northwest Regional Barista Championships (you know, for “ideas”) and those who wern’t were leaving that night.
While sipping one of the best Gibraltars I’ve had in a while, one of the old-skool Ritual employees came to me in distress. It turns out in the absence of owners, one must take it upon themselves to sneak through their belongings. What this employee was not expecting to discover was a lens into the sinister heart of that operation.
It gets worse:
Jeremy! How could you! And when did you learn how to read?